An Identity

Its a sunday afternoon and I am perfectly idle.Before I could get into any devilish thought,I thought it better to pen down something.It depends on you how substantial it is.This blog is about me.

It has taken me years to know myself and I still am amazed when I find new shades to my personality.I am a soul who would refute the typical definition of a "girl" yet I am feminine.I am stubborn,headstrong yet emotional,love to live in my quixotic world yet pragmatic,dead ambitious but compromising and definitely the right person at the right place for the right things.I know my limits and whenever I feel my stray mind demands to cross this barrier,I don't let go of it.I have my own idiosyncrasies,my own ethics, my own principles but I bend them whenever I feel like satisfying my self-serving bias.I am a perfectly ordinary girl who dreams of achieving the extra ordinary.I am a person who has strong definitions of her likings and prejudices.I am not ideal and I err.Sometimes the sense of guilt which creeps into me is too strong.I strive to reach out to the excellence deep within me.I feel everything's relative in this life and so I have no absolute feelings.I have my own weaknesses and gladly enough I know them.I am an individual who loves her self-esteem and dignity more than anything else.I can fight against any odds for it.I dread to face my subconscious coz I know I have something over there which I would never like to face.I am not a maverick neither am a heterodox.I am a simple girl with the most complex psyche.

I am the person who would ideally love Howard Roark and I prefer solitude.I love everyone who is a part of my life and I am happy we ever met. I always try to find out the right reasons for anything that I do.I am absolutely content for everything I own and possess.I paint my illusions with the colors of my dreams.I have suffered a lot for not making it out to the top of what I ever desired of but now that everything seems to fall in place,I have come to know that I should always wait for the right time to come through.I know I just have to hold onto to make my dreams come true.I am the one who has realised that we will never get everything and anything that we crave for .Coz at the end of the day whatever happens, happens for a reason and that reason is always awesome.

I am an imperfect individual who tries to match the most of perfection.I know what I am and perhaps thats what drives me to the dead end of everything.Till I meet my subconscious, I know I will dread nothing.I am a part of the quarter life crisis now but I know I will come out of it too.I love my life and I live it.Perhaps thats what keeps me going on and on.You can call me a narcissist for this but I absolutely love myself.